Mystery of Parenthood Podcast 19 – Faith, Life, and Mystery – 04-17-13

Listen to the April 17, 2013 Mystery of Parenthood Podcast regarding the intersection between Faith and Life in Marriage, Family Life, and the Mystery of Parenthood.

Mystery of Parenthood Podcast – Parenting in the Funnel

Listen to our Mystery of Parenthood radio show when the two of us discussed Parenting in the Funnel.  We have received many requests to have this show made into a podcast due to its practical applications throughout the parenting process.  We hope you enjoy it!

“Living Stones”, Building, and Mystery

In his short time as Pope, Francis has used the image of “living stones” several times when referring to the need for building that seems to already be a significant theme of his pontificate.  In addition to using the image in his homilies, the Pope’s choice of names and the Chair of Peter on which he sits further speak to the theme of building.  After all, St. Francis was called by Christ to “rebuild His Church”, and St. Peter was told by Christ that he would be the “Rock” on which He would build His Church.  Furthermore, the image itself comes from St. Peter, the Rock himself:

Come to him, to that living stone, rejected by men but in God’s sight chosen and precious; and like living stones be yourselves built into a spiritual house, to be a holy priesthood, to offer spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ. (I Peter 2:4-5)

Obviously, Pope Francis means this for all Christians, but I especially believe that he is speaking to families, to parents, to the domestic Church, to you and me, as the living stones which will be built up into a spiritual household, the household of God, the Church.  First, one need only look at his coat of arms to see that the family is at the center of his attention.  Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, the Holy Family, fill up the shield – the sunburst with the Greek letters, “IHS”, representing the first three letters, JES, of Jesus’ Name, the star – the symbol of Mary, and the nard flower (it looks like grapes) traditionally used to represent Joseph and his purity.  Second, a house itself tends to illicit thoughts of the place where families live.  The word “house” was chosen, not “Temple”, not “Church”.  Again, “house” makes one think of a home where husbands, wives, moms, and dads live, work, and relate to one another.  If I’m right about his speaking to families, then these images of living stones and the theme of building should be both a rich source for meditation and a guide for practical application in our living out the Mystery of our Parenthood.  Here are just a couple of thoughts that should help each of us live as and raise up “living stones” for the building up of the Church.

1) Like the Church, our domestic churches must walk with, build on, and profess Christ, and Him Crucified. As parents, we must be His disciples.  And, as disciples, Christ Crucified must be the center, the source, and the summit of our home.  Pope Francis puts it this way, “When we walk without the Cross, when we build without the Cross, and when we profess without the Cross, we are not disciples of the Lord.”  In fact, he points out that if we do not confess Jesus Christ, “nothing will avail”.  Jesus Himself says as much in the Gospel of John, “Apart from me, you can do nothing” (John 15:5).

This points us directly to the mystery that each of us live in our marriages and in our parenting.  Do we really realize that apart from Him, we can do nothing?  At (or around) our home tonight, 3 children went to 3 different practices – two baseball, one soccer FYI, while another went to a Bible Study (thank God for a teenage driver – apart from him, we might have done better than nothing, but we certainly couldn’t have done everything), everyone ate a meal (albeit prepackaged – Chicken Nuggets and Creamed Spinach – and late – finished at 9:20, but everyone ate), the dishes were cleaned, the children went to bed quietly after only one visit asking them to stop talking, I’m doing this, and Steph’s doing her devotional.  That’s far from nothing.  I imagine that a great majority of our neighbors, perhaps even you, had a similar evening.  Many of them may not even be practicing Christians.  They did something.  Something availed.  Right?

Here’s where the image of living stones helps me to understand.  Sometimes I’m just a stone, not a living stone.  Stones all look very similar and seem to be doing the same thing, but living stones are different.  When I’m, when you’re, when we’re living stones, things may look the same from the outside – baseball practice, nuggets, and dishes, but something’s different.  When we’re living stones, we have the eyes of faith to recognize the mystery – the invisible realities behind the ordinary stuff of the day-to-day.  And, without that recognition, we really have done nothing.  We’re just stones.  St. Irenaeus stated that “the glory of God is man fully alive”.  A “living stone” is fully alive.  So, does being fully alive mean that what we do is always exciting?  Does being fully alive require climbing Mount Everest or vacationing on the Riviera or eating at the finest restaurants, or traveling to far away resorts?  Or perhaps does being fully alive mean recognizing something behind the ordinary everyday stuff?  I think Stephanie, my wife and love of my life, may provide some insight into this question.  When, in our home, she sees laundry baskets full (let’s be realistic, overflowing) with clean laundry and jokingly begins to fold the clothes that make up what she calls “Mount Neverest”, she is a “living stone”.

This point brings us full circle to Jesus again, particularly in the Eucharist- the source and summit of our lives.  There, in what looks like a wafer, a cracker, is the King of Kings, the Lord of Lords, the Bread of Life.  Yet, if we only look at the outward appearances and fail to see the mystery, fail to see the Lord, fail to see the invisible because of the ordinariness of the visible, we are merely stones – stones that cannot be built into anything, stones that can do nothing.

2)  The practical application for this insight and the way in which we participate in the building that Pope Fransis calls us to is found in the second half of the quote from St. Peter above – “like living stones be yourselves built into a spiritual house, to be a holy priesthood, to offer spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ“.  The Fathers of the Second Vatican Council in the document Lumen Gentium (34) build on what Peter says:

Hence the laity, dedicated as they are to Christ and anointed by the Holy Spirit, are marvelously called and prepared so that even richer fruits of the Spirit may be produced in them.  For all their works, prayers, and apostolic undertakings, family and married life, daily work, relaxation of mind and body, if they are accomplished in the Spirit – indeed even the hardships of life if patiently born – all these become spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ.  In the celebration of the Eucharist these may most fittingly be offered to the Father along with the body of the Lord.  And so, worshipping everywhere by their holy actions, the laity consecrate the world itself to God, everywhere offering worship by the holiness of their eyes. (CCC 901, LG 34)

That offering, that “consecration of the world itself to God”, happens when we – moms, dads, husbands, wives – unite our folding of the clothes of Mount Neverest, our cooking of yummy chicken nuggets, our driving of children to baseball practice – that is, our day-to-day, ordinary events to the perfect, once for all sacrifice of “that living stone, rejected by men but in God’s sight chosen and precious” – that is, Jesus made present again in every Mass.  We offer our spiritual sacrifices “through Him, with Him, and in Him” at every Mass, if only we’ll be “living stones”.  Pope Francis points again to the value of the everyday when he stated, “with every movement of our lives, let us build!”

So, your assignment and mine going forward from our new leader is to become living stones by participating in the mystery that is our day to day lives as husbands, wives, moms, dads.  First, we must pray. We must ask God to open our eyes to see Him at work in the everyday in order that we might become fully alive, the glory of God.  Second, we need to offer our day to day in union with the living stone, with Jesus in the Mass.  When these two things begin to happen in each of our lives, the building up of the Church will be underway.  Let us build!

 

 

 

Listen to our Relevant Radio Interview:

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‘Parenting in the Funnel’ by Trey Cashion

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Parenting in the Funnel

Parenting in the Funnel

One way of being a way of being a sign of God to our children is to “Parent in the Funnel” .  This involves teaching our children about and setting limits for our children over time.  It also involves teaching our children about authentic freedom.  Freedom is the ability to do what one ought to do.  In fact, Blessed John Paul II, said that true freedom is doing what one wants to do when they are doing what they ought to do.  It is integrity.  It is not license.  Parenting in the Funnel involves moving your children (in a way similar to how God desires to move us) from limits and boundaries towards increasingly greater freedom that ultimately includes their setting their own limits and boundaries.  To a place where St. Augustine can say, “Love and do what you will.”  Parents, in doing this, are actually mirroring God’s move over time from limits, i.e. Thou Shalt Nots, to a New Testament fulfillment of using freedom to love God and to love our neighbor as ourselves.  The Mystery of Parenthood is at least, in part, being a sign of God to our children.  Parenting in the funnel helps us to be this sign.

Today, Freedom is often equated with license – doing whatever one wants to do.  That could not be farther from the truth as revealed in and through the Christian faith.  Freedom is for love – self-gift, it is for truth, it is for God, and it is for neighbor.  It is for someone or something.  It is not an end in itself.  We need to help our children understand this great truth in order that they can live a full, conscious, and active life that is inspired by truth and love and is inspirational to those who see them live it out.  This world needs people like this.  It needs saints.  In fact, saints show us this great truth about freedom and it’s link to one’s finding themselves through freely giving themselves even if it costs them something, even if it costs them their lives.  In this current environment of relativism where truth is defined by the individual on a subjective basis – i.e., what’s true for me may not be true for you, we need people who know that objective truth exists, that freedom is meant for seeking, finding, and following that truth and that happiness is found in using freedom for that purpose.  Parents need to embrace the great honor they’ve been given to help form their children and themselves in this frequently forgotten truth, particularly in this age of relativism.

Parenting and the Eucharist

Today was another first in our marriage and parenting journey!  We were on national radio together.  You can listen by going to the archives of the Morning Air Show with Sean Herriot on Relevant Radio at http://relevantradio.com/audios/morning-air-with-sean-herriott.  It should be up later today.